Somehow I managed to get this page done even though my car died its final death and I had to go out and get a new (used) car yesterday and my kiddo is home sick. I owned the old one outright (no monthly payments), but I've been throwing so much money into continually fixing it up in the last year. I won't be throwing heaps into it, but I've got monthly car payment now, but at least it works! LOL Anyway, got the page done! Feeling good about the result!
15 thoughts on “Love Not Found – Ch24, p37”
Tiffany
Wow, I am just glad you’re okay and was able to afford that! Hope your kiddo feels better soon!
Anyway, this is a lovely remembrance!
Gina Biggs
Me too! It puts me in squeaking by territory adding a car payment onto my current expenses, but I was able to find a used one in good condition that wasn’t crazy expensive and got it right before the tariffs go into effect, so I got a better deal than if I had waited. Just stinks to have to do it. Was hoping my old car would hang on just a bit longer. Also, thank you! Kiddo is doing well and resting.
Karin
Interesting to see his recollections of his young daughters involve memories of physical touch. Holding Evette, steadying Abeille. Seems like he was ok with being a hands-on parent.
Felis Dee
I believe earlier in the story – when Poppy went to volunteer at the centre – they established that touch with children was considered okay, because very little children needed that tactile bonding with someone in order to develop. It’s only when they get older that touch is considered taboo. In Mallow’s memories where he is touching Evette and Abeille, they’re toddlers/infants, so touch would not be that big of a deal.
Kendall 🫐
I didn’t find that exactly, around here maybe. Abeille glowed during her time as a foster, and there was the Miharu cameo.
I go back to how just touch by itself was not what Abeille found lacking at the beginning of the story. The touch club was kind of gross. Connection is what she did not find, and what I don’t find in the present day. Infants need touch. Adults need touch not just for sex. I think we have a similar touch taboo now on earth. Women touch each other. Men touch for sex or violence only. This is a crisis.
Karin
Oh yeah, I know that kids are acknowledged to have a need for touch. I’m just pointing out that the fact that Mallow is doing it himself, that those moments are times he truly cherishes… that’s the significant part.
Jenny
That is a very sincere and endearing eulogy, Mallow. Someone who actually treasured his daughters for who they truly are.
Bleuryder
This is super pretty, but I feel like neither of the parents actually knew Evette. His memories are basically of her childhood, and watching her grow up but notice he doesn’t say anything about her AFTER she grew up.
Did they know anything about her? I only say this because I had a similar experience with my family in the way that they thought they knew everything about me, but didn’t. When asked why the information they thought they knew was wrong, I told them that they never bothered to ask me about well…me.
In a way I’m similar to Evette that way. I was the perfect kid, with a toned down version of the mom, who immediately quieted down when I said “Do you even know what my all time favorite movie is?” and she couldn’t answer. All their stories of me were of my childhood and my triumphs (Im the only college graduate in my family), but both my parents couldn’t even tell you what my favorite color is. I get that vibe from the same page here, intentional or not.
I didn’t expect this page to hit me in such a personal way, and sorry for the long post. For those wondering, unlike Abeille ‘s mom, mine went to therapy to fix that, and our relationship is better, but it took her a long time to get there. And for the record, my All time favorite movie is a very cliché one, Howl’s Moving Castle.
Kendall 🫐
That is touching. My father was absent, so I relate to that part of what you have said. It feels to me like there is a giant unknown area after their childhoods (Evette and Abeille). Why is Amaryllis the way she is. Once upon a time there were sketches on Patreon of Amaryllis being too rough brushing Abeille’s hair. Anyway, it makes sense to me what you say about the part where the 2 sisters became themselves being missing, possibly because those parts were neglected by the parents. 2 beautiful and wise daughters I can imagine could be the basis for some jealousy from the mother, but there is little information to speculate from. It is wonderful to hear Mallow’s sentiments. I am not sure how he could be standing up for his daughter more. I’ve had a partner who could not be challenged. Or I did not see a way to challenge her, so I sort of worked around what she insisted on. Maybe that is what is going on with them. If you love someone deeply, being separate from them can be a difficult thing to do. I still can’t hate Abeille’s mother, but I certainly am happy about her freedom from her and hope this ends well.
Bastet
You’re not wrong, but with a mother like Abeille’s, a child learns to hide who they are, for their own wellbeing. I know I did.
It doesn’t even have to be a conscious decision, or a deliberate campaign of lies – just, when every time you mention your hobbies, aspirations, or friends, you get criticised or mocked, you learn to stop that – the same way you learned to stop sticking your hand into fire.
Story time:
I remember one time, I put some more effort into my appearance, and she must have noticed. Just as I was leaving, she commented in that horribly derisive voice she does, “wearing shirts like THAT, you’ll NEVER manage to find a boyfriend!” very clearly trying to hurt my feelings/self-confidence – and I had to run outside, but not to cry – to avoid bursting out in laughter! You see, the offending shirt, that had a cartoon on it, was a birthday gift from my boyfriend! And I was leaving to meet with him!
But if she had known that, there would have been NO end to disparaging, derisive comments on my every quality, good or bad.
Bastet
What the– why did my paragraph breaks get eaten?? Why are other people allowed to have paragraph breaks, what am I doing wrong?
Kendall 🫐
What I have been doing is adding more than one link break between paragraphs. The result is 1 line break, as opposed to no line break. I don’t think I’ve seen space between paragraphs.
allswellz
I experienced a very similar upbringing and there is something about our psychosocial development that speaks to this phenomenon. As children, we are often dependent on our parents for social interaction. As we become teenagers and more independent adults, we withdraw and are no longer actively sharing the things about us that have changed with our parents like we would as a child with every new experience or drawing! It becomes more difficult to know the person that your child is becoming when their world naturally revolves around people who are more their age, but it is still an important responsibility for the parent who wants to remain an active presence in the life of their adult children.
brick
Omg this is so touching! ;w;
Thea
Getting teary eyed at Dad’s speech!
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